The article mentioned no names, but a lady who knew which church it was sent a link to a Pastor in that church.
The response was immediate. As in, this Pastor would not leave such an important matter to the next day, but had to text at once, at 9:26 at night, because this needed resolving!
You're probably wondering, was it so he could share his sorrow about what happened to that new member couple? Or to call them and console them in Christian love? Was it so he could review options as to how to prevent this kind of abuse of members from happening again? Was it even as extreme as to call the offending and unrepentant Elder to let him know that while he was welcome to attend church, he was no longer to represent the church in a leadership position?
No.
The call was to me, as he knew I was involved in this facebook page, and it was first, to see if an admission as to who wrote it could be had. Second, when I didn't play into that standard bit of nonsense, to chastise me anyway that such descriptions of such problems did not aid things.
Quite a bit saddened at how blatantly he had chose to miss the point, I texted him back the following:
"You need to focus on any in leadership who act ungodly, and when that's actually handled, you can then move on to dealing with the reactions of the members that such unrepentant leaders hurt. Meanwhile, if any leader is expressing hurt by a random net article, please counsel them at once on the need to forgive. That's how it works, right?"
There was no answer back. What had been important enough to contact me past the time when bill collectors are legally allowed to call was now no longer important enough to discuss.
Because you see, he was the same guy who always counseled "forgiveness" to any in the church who ever complained about this wolf in Elder's clothing.
And don't get me wrong, he - the guy who texted me - is a nice guy. A good guy. Heck, a great guy! But sadly, he's no shepherd. The title of "Pastor", which derives from "Pasture" and pertains to shepherding, is misapplied to him. Once he may have been, but he is a Pastor no more.
Nor is the other Pastor in that church a real Pastor. They are both retired, but as the church has no official minister, they're kind of the "default" Pastors. And while they try, it shows. The wolf can do no wrong, they being long familiar with him, so they've re-purposed their "job" as "Pastors" to be "sheep quieting" as opposed to "sheep protecting".
They each value quiet among the flock. They do not want to hear the bleating of frightened or hurt sheep. Of course, as any shepherd knows, there are two ways to go about this.
One is the Christ-like way of actually protecting the flock from the wolf. Of driving the wolf off when he tries to bite or savage or scare the sheep. The other way - a good deal less dangerous - involves waiting till a sheep bleats in pain from a wolf bite, then hitting it on the head with your staff and telling it to be quiet and "forgive".
The two "Pastors" that church has prefer the second way. Where the sheep are told to be quiet and forgive the wolf. And the wolf is - at best - tsked, tsked and then allowed to retain his leadership titles so he can do the more damage later.
What the Pastor who texted me did not know is that I had had that article available for a couple of weeks, but had not run it. There was, to my way of thinking, a distant hope that maybe the wolf would knock it off. So it's not like I'm panning on those two former Pastors, I could be fooled into trying, too.
Just the difference is that I don't need to see a wolf bite for years to know it's a wolf. The half dozen times I've seen it bite in the past six months is enough for me.
And sure enough, this past Sabbath, the wolf decided to start trouble with yet another member of the church, and when the young man's mother tried to stop him, became physically aggressive with her.
Understand, this wolf is in his seventies, so if he chose to invade a man's personal space, and do the nose to nose chest bump thing it would be laughed off. But he's a healthy enough man all the same, and his victim was a woman, who really did not feel comfortable with him menacing her.
Which is, after all, an actual crime. Yeah, really.
She bleated - er, complained. The "shepherd", the "Pastor", came over at once and got her safely to another room where...
...he reprimanded her on her bleating! On her anger at being accosted and bullied. Understand that the this wolf of an Elder, who has harmed member after member over the years, had actually broke the law. You are not supposed to frighten women at church, that's not a thing. It's remarkable to me that any could think it is.
But it's part and parcel of this long pattern. Where the wolf bites, the sheep bleats, and the shepherd yells, "Quiet!". Which accounts for why the wolf would feel so comfortable acting out so outrageously.
What's the lesson in all this?
Well, first and foremost, churches need real Pastors. An actual minister, properly assigned and getting things done. Stopping problems before they start and reining in any fellow "leaders" who might start to stray. Stopping them while they are yet just bad sheep, and not waiting till they turn into real wolves from long neglect.
The second lesson is, "Be careful about appearances." A cynic, for instance, might be forgiven for thinking that the supposed Pastors always let the wolf do as he pleases because the wolf is rich and donates a lot. Now me, I don't believe that. I think that it's just that they're so long familiar with the wolf being a wolf and the sheep being patient enough to put up with it that they've got a bit complacent.
But by appearances, it looks like they're selling indulgences. Not a good message to send. And really, as much as I love them, it really, REALLY looks a lot like that. Which is not on the old or new members who notice it - it's on them for letting such appearances come to be.
The third lesson is, "That a guy is nice does not make him great at his job." Both of these guys are nice. I know and love them both. More than they know. But if the job is "protecting the flock", then yeah, they've failed. And rather massively.
I've watched a woman cry in frustration at how this wolf treats people - and the pastor then chastises her for complaining in the "wrong" fashion. And accusing her and her friends of being a "lynch mob" for their high crime of seeking out the pastor and pleading for his help.
I've heard the pain in a man's voice relating the ungodly grief he was gave by that wolf, when the wolf seized the pulpit to spew venom upon that man and his family. He gets counseled to forgive the wolf, so that the wolf may continue for yet more years in attacks upon he and his loved ones.
I've seen the pro-LBGTQ and pro-Sunday worshipping church posts on this Elder's facebook page. That are left up year after year, as there will be no repercussions or penalties for that craziness.
I've dealt with those who he lied to and promised jobs to, if they'd but join him in some kind of petty issue against other members. These recovering alcoholics were men I aided in my own ministry, who then did not return to the church. Perhaps for other reasons - but surely this wolf's crap was in the mix.
I've witnessed his sly malice in whispering gossip at church potlucks. Gossip about the mom of a member. Darkness and dirt to no point but to sow dissension. And then he calmly lied about it, and the "shepherds" then counseled the injured party to - can you guess? Yeah. Forgive the wolf, while simultaneously not admitting the wolf did any wrong.
I've seen him pretend to resign all his titles when he thinks he's busted. Then he waits for the "Pastors" to come and beg him not to leave, even though he clearly had no real intention of leaving. Then, after the "shepherds" have persuaded the wolf to come back, he calmly sits back down in his Boardroom seat as if nothing happened.
I've been there when he wanted to poke at a good and decent young man, then play the victim. Shepherds? They let the young man know to keep silent.
I've seen him then get in the face of the young man's mother, acting like he was wanting some kind of bar fight. A bar fight! Is this what will represent the church? The "Pastors" certainly think it's okay. They had no trouble with his violence - but told off the woman who dared say that she might defend herself next time.
Did you count those up? Because I've seen and heard of those JUST IN THE LAST SIX MONTHS!
It's terrible. It has drove off those who might have joined. It has drove off those who were already members. It has crossed all bounds of reasons, but with each new bleating of the sheep, and each new sheep freshly bleating, the "shepherds" only re-double their efforts to have silence in the field!
The greatest of the three lessons then is truly -
Nice guys are great - but you need a shepherd who knows how to use his staff! Against the wolf, not the sheep! Remember in the Bible? "Thy rod and thy staff they comfort me...", not "thy rod and thy staff keep my mouth shut while the wolves render apart my loved ones".
The wolf is not the real problem, you see. And that is the lesson every one most needs to learn. The wolf is not the real problem. Internalize that.
The wolf is not the real problem.
Even if the wolf left, another wolf would take his place. It's the lack of Pastors that is the problem. The lack of any actual Shepherd. It's being a pastorless church that is the problem.
That church needs a shepherd. It needs an actual pastor who knows that there are sheep and there are wolves, and can figure out which needs protecting from which. No nice guys who enjoy wolf petting need apply.
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